You Might Be a Facebook Ho If…

A friend recently posted this Facebook status update, “Doc is wondering how does someone have 500 friends on FB. I don’t know 500 people…”, which got me to thinking in a “Jeff Foxworthy” kind of way…

Ewwww!!!

You might be a Facebook ho if you have “friends” you’ve never met face-to-face.

You might be a Facebook ho if you “friend” someone you haven’t seen since 5th grade.

You might be a Facebook ho if you “friend” your ex.

You might be a Facebook ho if you “friend” the ex of your current s.o.

You might be a Facebook ho if you “friend” your kid’s friends.

You might be a Facebook ho if you “friend” your friends friends, even if you don’t know them.

You might be a Facebook ho if you think Michael Phelps or Ellen Degeneres are really your friends because they “confirmed” your friend request.

You might be a Facebook ho if the guy in line behind you looks familiar and then you realize it’s because you’re FB “friends”.

You might be a Facebook ho if the only interaction you’ve ever had with someone is to accept their friend request. 

You might be a Facebook ho if you “friend” a former boss who fired you.

You might be a Facebook ho if you send an invite to join Facebook to your entire e-mail address book.

You might be a Facebook ho if you keep “friending” the same person over and over.

You might be a Facebook ho if you “friend” former significant others.
Facebook Ho

You might be a Facebook ho if you have a monthly quota for number of “friends” added.

You might be a Facebook ho if once you go over 25 you know exactly how many “friends” you have on Facebook.

You might be a Facebook ho if you keep track of how many “friends” your friends have.

You might be a Facebook ho if you feel popular for the first time in your life and you’ve been out of high school for over 10 years.


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4 thoughts on “You Might Be a Facebook Ho If…

  1. I agree with a lot of what you’re saying here but it could do with more detail. – Go see that turkey for yourself, and see for yourself why you shouldn’t see it. – Samuel Goldwyn 1882 – 1974

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